19, Seriously?!?!

So I am looking at the news online today and I see that this Jim Bob and Linda Lu, or whatever the hell her name is, Dugger have brought home their 19th kid. Dude, we got it, you like to screw, now knock it off!

You and your wife are assholes for bringing in 19 kids.

I understand that you want to win the annual flag football game at the family reunion but you don’t have to bring your own team, both offense and defense.

And you are really not helping out with the southern stereotype of barefoot and pregnant.

My guess is that they are secretly white supremacists and they are single handedly trying to keep the Caucasian race from ever being in the minority.

Someone please get me their address so that I can send them a Wii or a magazine subscription or something to keep them busy.

But you really are assholes, because you are screwing up these kids from the beginning. That poor little fucker that you just brought home will never have anything brand new, except for maybe a little brother or sister. Don’t you think that’s kind of shitty parenting? Hey, let’s have a bunch of kids and make them feel like they are not as important as the first couple. Let’s dress this one in those stylish double knit reversible polyester plaid slacks. You know its retro so it’s fashionable again. Even though the others had to wear them when they were just old clothes. You know at least three of them are going to end up in a bell tower with a deer rifle. Bang Bang, my daddy didn’t hug me enough (no shit, you know how long it takes to hug that many people, get in line son), bang bang, mom never gave me a coloring book that wasn’t already completely colored in, bang bang, daddy always forgot my name!!!

And when those kids get out of that house they will have no idea how to manage money and will buy every new thing that comes out and end up on welfare for the rest of us to take care of, simply because mom and dad wanted to be famous for doing the wild money dance more than anyone else. And you know sex for them isn’t fun anymore, its work. What do you want to bet that they got one of those punch in time clocks by their bed? Not like they are going to catch mom with some slutty outfit from Adam & Eve on while chasing a ball gagged Jim Bob with a bullwhip, screaming “Bad Senator, bad!” Nope, it’s do it and get it over with so that we can have Sally Struthers come and start an infomercial for us. For only 49 cents a day you can help feed a Dugger child.

And I am sure if they were interviewed they would say that they are happy. But the people in the former communist U.S.S.R. thought that they were happy too, until they found out that they didn’t have to wait in line for hours at a time to get toilet paper.

I bet these kids are all home schooled. Hell, they would have to because there is no way to get that many kids to school at one time. Getting them dressed for school would be next to impossible. Well I guess if they had their own bus, because it would be a bus full of them. So you know they are going to be social retards and won’t know how to act out on their own. And could you imagine 19 fuckers at the grocery store check out? Each of them bitching and moaning because they want candy or a drink and why does this one get to ride on the buggy, he rode on the buggy last time, I want to ride…. Oh dammit someone get me a shotgun!! I’m about to do society a favor.

Oh and could you imagine this bunch of assholes vacationing at the same place you where at the same time you where? Someone get me that Van der Sloot kid, O.J. and Robert Blake’s phone numbers pronto!!

I just think that these people really should knock off the knocking boots and think about other people. No one wants to be around this gaggle/heard/covey…whatever of people, ever, at all, under any circumstances.

Don’t even get me started on these people going trick or treating or Christmas shopping. Do you think that they are trying to have a birthday every day of the year or something?

While I’m on it, Octomom and Kate Gose..Gosl..Gosa…Kate and Eight, you knock that shit off too.

If I was the mom I would be afraid that the next time I got pregnant, and you know there is going to be a next time, that the kid would just fall out walking down the hall or if she sneezed. Damn woman, alone time is a good thing. I bet you can’t take a pee without an audience.

Look all that I am saying is that a woman’s birth canal should not look like a ride at Wet and Wild, that’s all.

- Don’t get dead