Tuesday, March 14, 2006

A desperate plea for help from a higher power!

Ok, I am not going to preach to anyone and I wouldn’t push religion on anyone. But people I need some spiritual help!! I need everyone regardless of religious belief or affiliation to pray to the higher being of your choice for some rain, I got steaks and ribs that really need to be put on the grill and this burn ban thing is getting ridiculous! Let me rephrase that, if there is anyway we could get enough rain between now and Saturday that would be great. I am working on a tee time for Saturday and I would like to be sans precipitation for that. And then after Saturday it could pick back up and rain again for a couple of days.

It is just sheer hell knowing that there is some top quality beef just sitting in my freezer when what it really wants is to be laid atop a metal rack over a nice stack of white hot coals. Every time I walk by the freezer I can hear those tender little morsels of tasty goodness calling out to me. They say “We were not made to sit in a freezer, we like the heat! We want to be grilled and put on a plate next to our best friend Baked Potato! Oh how we miss Baked Potato, we love him! Please help us escape this frozen hell.” For the love of everything holy let it rain!! And it’s not like this is just one or two whiney little fillets, oh no, it is much more serious than that. I have dozens of prime cuts that need to be freed from the icy grips of the white box o’ cold.

Now yeah, I could bake the ribs in the oven, but what good is that? Ribs got to have smoke. Can’t do smoke in the kitchen, well not on purpose anyway. That’s like having tacos with just plain ground beef, no seasoning. Just can’t have that. So if I can, I would just enough rain to where I can fire up the grill on Saturday afternoon when I get back from a nice round of golf. Can anyone help me?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ham, no burger.
Kool-aid, no sugar.
Cereal, no milk.
Some things are just plain wrong.

Booya said...

I know, I aint never got two things that go together!!

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